The Barb Wire canon

Updated the next day

Continuing my Great Literature series begun with Red Sonja and Conan, I’ve started reading the Barb Wire saga.

She’s a part of the Dark Horse Universe. We forget (or even don’t know) about it because of the supremacy of the DC and Marvel mythologies; like Greek and Roman, in no particular order, since so many of the super strength, super fast, invisible, other-dimension-origined, et al. are merely different manifestations of the same gods. Dark Horse fits into this framework but on a smaller scale and with some indie differences. For example: there is the odd character Concrete who is a man with his body replaced–for some reason–with a minimal-featured stone body, and who has to learn to live in his new circumstances. It’s more middle-aged Bildungsroman than superhero. Dark Horse’s polished indieness is appealing in a different manner than the experimentation of less established indie publishers. Solid yet daring.

Continue reading The Barb Wire canon

The Hellcats (1968), MST3K, The Moonfire Inn

Early in the movie, the Army Sergeant hero going undercover ends up at The Moonfire Inn to infiltrate those rapscalious (?), brother-killing bikers in their local haunt. When watching bad 70s movies and I see a named restaurant or bar, or a phone number, I get obsessed with a search for any remnants of it that may still exist. Either to see a record that it once-had-been or to see it manifest in its current form. When I was reading S.T.A.R. Flight (1969), there was an insert for the DeVry Institute (yes, that one) that was to be mailed back to 4141 Belmont Ave. Chicago, IL 60641 and I had to screen cap the current street view. (When my dad no longer was, one artifact left behind that fascinated me was a jar of matchbooks from various restaurants and hotels he ate and stayed at as a salesman throughout the 70s and 80s. Since then, I wanted to create a blog with an entry for each matchbook and what could be discovered of its origin. Still a good idea (and TBD) but probably a manifestation rather than source of my obsession.)

Continue reading The Hellcats (1968), MST3K, The Moonfire Inn

Girl Boss: Revenge

Updated 6 May 2021

This is the second of the pinky violence flicks I got recently, along with Delinquent Girl Boss: Blossoming Night Dreams, while trying (hopelessly) to fill the missing slots in my collection. The films and series are difficult to keep track of, but I’ve made an attempt (trust me ~60%): this movie is from the Girl Boss series with Reiko Ike and Miki Sugimoto, which includes two Girl Boss Blues entries. It is different than the Delinquent Girl Boss series with Reiko Oshida, which, though that series contains a “reform school” entry, is different than the Terrifying Girls’ High School series with Reiko Ike and Miki Sugimoto. And these have nothing to do with Delinquent Girl Boss from the Stray Cat Rock series.

Continue reading Girl Boss: Revenge

Notes: Outlaw of Gor

I just watched this on MST3K. Their marathon station on PlutoTV (channel 385) is constantly on in the background when I work from home, and so it often bleeds over to the weekends. The humor of the series is not as frequent as when I originally watched in college, but the banter between Joel, Mike, and the robots is like TV comfort food. Even just looking over to see Crow gab at the screen can lighten an oppressive day. That charm is their staying power.

🎶 …he’ll have to sit and watch them all while they monitor his mind… 🎶

There were 35 books from 1966 to this 2019 (!), and two movies: Gor (1987) and Outlaw of Gor (1988). The books are well known for their S&M and misogyny and are an egregious rip-off of both Conan the Barbarian and Edgar Rice Burroughs’ Barsoom series. The latter is pretty dated and contains its own “quaint” views of women, but those views are explained by the early 20th century publishing date. The Gor novels began being published during the heyday of 2nd wave feminism, so they are more of a push toward for a more subservient time rather than a “grandpa just doesn’t know better” moment.

The main character is a college professor (Tarl Cabot) who gets transported to a parallel Earth that is stuck in some Conan world. There, he becomes a brave warrior saving/having his way with slave women and generally alpha-maling it up. The author (John Norman) of the books is a college professor (John Frederick Lange, Jr.) who has decidedly not been transported to the land of subservient slave women, but can at least Mary Sue his way there.

How you see yourself… (cover of Outlaw of Gor by Boris Vallejo)
…vs. how you really look… (MST3K lover letter to Gor)
…vs. the first image that comes up in a search. (Rebecca Ferratti as Telena from Gor, also appears in Ace Ventura, Beverly Hills Cop II, and Three Amigos)

Reading randomly through the Goodreads reviews, I found Jason Pettus’s review of Outlaw, which linked to his review of Tarnsman, the first Gor novel, and why he started reading them. He had been the owner of the now defunct Chicago Center for Literature and Photography, author of a few books, but took on the noble task of experiencing all that is Gor. Or at least all he can stomach:

I’ve decided to finally tackle John Norman’s infamously sexist series of “Gor” S&M erotic fantasy novels, which I first developed a fascination for in 2006 when I spent a year playing Second Life, and met a group of literally hundreds of people (men and women, young and old) who were there specifically to persistently roleplay in a Gorean setting 24 hours a day, in some cases to supplement a quasi-Gorean lifestyle they were living in real life as well. I’m basically going to be reading as many of the books as I can stand before I get sick of it all (I doubt I will make it through all 34 [ed. now 35] of them)

Links for reference:

Bonus: their song about the almost-nudity in the film.

Tom Servo: Hey fellows, there sure is a lot of skin in this movie.
Mike: There sure is!
Crow T. Robot: Yet despite all the acres of flesh in this film, I just can’t come up with a word to describe it.
TS: Well I can!
CTR: You can?!
TS: Sure…

High Art ensues:

Update 30 Jan 2020:

I couldn’t help myself because I’m a 14-year-old boy:

Tom Servo:
Iiiiiit’s
Breastica boobical
Chestica mamical
Pendular globular fun.

Mike Nelson:
Fleshical orbital
Mombula scupula?

TS:
Right, all of that’s the one!

Crow T. Robot:
Is it guleal maximal
Tushical crackula
Buniona morning till night?

TS
Well you’re absito glandular
Fanny fantastical
Mastica fleshular right!

All:
It’s an aereological auto-erotical
Tubular boobular joy.
An exposular regional
Vagical pouchular
Fun for a girl and boy.
Oh it’s sisimal dorsical
Hung like a horsical
Calavaligical ball!

CTR:
The most bunula funula…

MTN:
Fruita baloobula…

CTR:
Frenchical toungular…

TS:
Wabida boobular…

(unintelligible closing chorus while Tom Servo sings:)

Bunula funula
Fruita baloobula
Frenchical toungular
Wabida boobular…

Delinquent Girl Boss: Blossoming Night Dreams

I started watching pinky violence films of the 60s/70s a few years back and over time built a large collection of DVDs of probably the most popular, and most accessible. The genre is listed as sexploitation, but they’re really just female gang oriented with little content that’s erotic or even erotic-adjacent. Many films in the genre are part of different series, each showcasing the same lead character across films. The DVDs I have include some complete series, but certain entries have been impossible to find. The two I just obtained were this one, the first of four Delinquent Girl Boss (Zubekô banchô) movies, and Girl Boss: Revenge [ 1973 | Wikipedia | IMDB ], the fourth of seven Girl Boss (Sukeban) movies. Somewhat confusing, I know.

Continue reading Delinquent Girl Boss: Blossoming Night Dreams